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Friday, September 23, 2011

Sick and Tired

So I love that I am pregnant but I am not loving first trimester blahs.  I feel nauseous all day and the only thing that settles my stomach is to eat.  But I remember how much I gained in the first tri with Anna so I'm trying to keep that in check.  Yesterday was a bad day, though, and I swear I ate all day:  two pancakes, a cookie, a handful of cheese curds, left over stew from the night before, a brownie, salad, bowl of soup, more cheese curds, Arby's roast beef sandwich, a value-size jamocha shake, cookies.  Sounds really yucky right? 

Over the past weekend I had some light spotting.  I never had anything like this with my first pregnancy so I got really upset and nervous!  Yes, I had been pretty active that week getting ready for Visit the Farm Day, which is an event we have been planning at work for over 5 months, but I couldn't really remember over-doing it.  I called the doctor right away and they told me to rest and not work at the event.  So I was crushed!  I knew they needed my help and I didn't really want to just sit at home and think about what could be happening to the baby.  So I decided to go anyway.  And I was good; really took it easy and tried not to do any major walking/lifting.  When I got home I rested for a good two days.  I caught a cold so I rested another day and took a sick day from work.  I haven't had any spotting since so I hope that all is going well.  They did bring me in to the doctor's for an ultrasound and the baby looks great.  Official due date is May 10th!

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Tears!

This weekend Eric and I went to a wedding.  Actually, Eric just met me at the reception after he finished up some chores.  This was the first night he had "off" of work for about a year.  I'm guessing, because I've really lost track.  So I wanted to enjoy the evening.

My first instinct was to leave Anna home.  She is at an awkward age where she isn't walking quite yet but wants to be independent.  So I knew the evening would be rough on her.  But my entire family was going to be there and they all wanted me to bring her.  So I did.

But she didn't want to be held and didn't want to crawl around (not that I was that thrilled about her crawling around with a dress on).  She didn't want daddy and she didn't want grandma or grandpa or her aunts, at least not for any length of time.  We sat down to eat and she didn't want to eat.  She basically was a bear.  And I can't really blame her!  She'd had one 45-minute nap, and there were strangers and loud noises.

Everyone could see that I was struggling to keep her happy.  And I was struggling to keep my emotions under control.  I was fighting back tears and was getting really frustrated.  And then one of our friends swooped in and offered to take her for a stroll around the room so that I could eat.  But instead of making the situation better, I just felt like I was a failure at keeping my toddler happy.  So I burst into tears and convinced Eric that we needed to take her to his mom's so that she could watch her.  So we gathered our little cinderella's things, unintentionally leaving behind one of her shoes, and hurried out the door before I burst fully into tears.

To make this story shorter, because I am struggling with some morning sickness at the moment, I cried, we took her to his mom's, I recovered, and we went back to the reception.  I wasn't able to fully relax or stop thinking about Anna (and how I wish things had turned out differently), but we did manage to have fun talking to some friends.  And danced a little. 

The moral of the story:  mommies feel like they have to do everything in their power to make it all go right, but some things just aren't going to.  And sometimes mommies need a bit of time to themselves to just enjoy the moment.  And pregnancy hormones can be a real pain in the butt!

Friday, September 2, 2011

Good thing Anna loves babies...

Good thing Anna likes to hold and kiss babies...  She says baby but she has absolutely no idea what she is in for!

Thursday, September 1, 2011

How I pee'd on a stick

Here is the full story, for those who want to know all of these great, but way to personal, details:

I've wanted to start on baby #2 almost immediately after Anna was born.  I was thrilled about my new baby girl but I missed being pregnant.  Call me crazy.  And I had a vision of oodles of kids and I guess I was just plain impatient.

We didn't officially start trying until much later, after Anna turned one.  And it only took us two months.

I am pretty sure that I know exactly when I ovulated and conceived.  I took a test ten days later on a Thursday afternoon and it was a negative.  Then I bled a little the day after.  So I figured, Aunt Flow was in town.  Hence, my statement that I was definitely NOT PREGNANT.  I told Eric this, but he was convinced that it was too early to test and that I could still be pregnant.  I hate to admit that he was right...

By the way, I'm not very good at sensing that I am pregnant. For my first pregnancy, it was Eric who convinced me to take a pregnancy test just in case.

So anyway, I thought I had gotten my period, but then the very light bleeding stopped. 

(any men reading this have also now stopped) 

And I couldn't figure it out.  Meanwhile I was tired and felt like I had no motivation all weekend.  On Monday after work I decided I'd better take a test.  So I bought a 3-pack at the drug store after picking Anna up.  I went straight home and tried to pee on the stick.  But I had just gone an hour earlier!  So I thought that I missed the stick with what little I had and that the test wasn't going to work.  I even touched the end and it felt bone dry.  Disappointed that I would now have to wait until later that night until my bladder was full again, I put it aside and went through the daily routine of making dinner, eating dinner, and cleaning up dinner.  Eric went back out to do some things around the farm.

I went upstairs to give Anna a bath and out of the corner of my eye I saw the test sitting there.  It was upside down because I have this thing about not wanting to watch the magic of the test happen.  I picked it up and my jaw dropped.  It was a positive!  So I grabbed Anna and rushed outside and walked as fast as I could carrying an almost 20-pound baby over to Eric who was loading plastic into his skid steer.  I couldn't contain the smile on my face. 

Eric knew something was up and guessed it I think even before I could hold the test up.  "You're pregnant?" I laughed.  He gave me a big hug and the smile on his face was priceless!

Pregnant!

You know how I said that I was definitely NOT PREGNANT!  Well...

I AM!!!!